I realized this week, on the 28th to be exact, that it was one year ago to the day that I found out about all of the health problems with sweet little Baby Rains.
Now you can imagine the emotions that came over me, but I had to STOP and meditate on where my family is today. I will never minimize the grief I felt during 2010, and I will never forget the anguish of NOT KNOWING if my child would be born very ill, not at all or if she would only last a few short days or even hours.
But GOD knew it all! He is holding our sweet baby girl and will take care of her much better than I ever could. And at the same time he is holding our family on this earth until we can join her.
My best friend repainted my kitchen during our struggle…might sound odd but she knew that it was something that I really wanted. After she painted I put the words "TRUST IN THE LORD WITH ALL YOUR HEART" from Proverbs 3: 5 on the wall. I FINALLY knew what that trust looked like.
Now ONE YEAR later I just feel this joy and peace knowing that I TRUSTED WITH ALL MY HEART…and HE WAS SO FAITHFUL. Our answer may not always be the answer that we would like, but God's ways are PERFECT. Yes…PERFECT!
And in the middle of our greatest anguish we can know that it WILL pass and God in His complete perfection will be glorified. This is the key. God is and has been glorified through the situation and a TRUST that was given WITH ALL MY HEART.
April,
ReplyDeleteI just happened to be sitting at my computer, working, when your email came through. WOW, it seems like time just moves so quickly, and I truly appreciate you writing to remind me to stop and smell the roses.
I'm so glad you, Brent and Lyric are happy and healthy. I'm sure it wasn't easy at all going through such a difficult time, and I'm sure your heart felt like it was in a million pieces. It is so incredible to know that God sends His comfort and takes all the pieces and creates something beautiful in the end.
Know that I love you so much and that I'm thankful you're part of my life. I love you in the sad times, and I love you in the happy times. Just knowing you're there means so much to me, and I'm grateful for your friendship. Thanks for sharing part of your heart with me my precious friend!
Tammy Johnson